How to deal with the unexpected and disappointment.

Some people say “when life brings you lemons, you make lemonade” and I have heard a couple say “when life brings you lemons you bring out the tequila”. But I won’t do that. I am past dealing with shitty things in life by trying to numb the pain with alcohol, or any other substance for that matter. So I won’t do that. Not sure I’ll be making lemonade either to be honest, because I don’t think that is the answer, or that I could turn something bitter into something sweet. Not sure I would want to for that matter.

Instead I will try to embrace what I have learnt, and tried to practice over the last four months, and just let go.

It may be easier said than done but reminiscing what was but is no longer will only hurt even more. It will induce a craving for something that is no more, and can be no more, and it will only cause more suffering. Just like philosophising and contemplating what may or may not be in the future will.

This is easier said than done of course but it is the best shot I have at finding my happiness again, in the now.

Some things happen in life and I believe that they happen for a reason. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t believe there is a higher power that has nothing better to do than play chess with us humans, on a giant chess board that is the universe, but I do believe that we can make the things that happen in our lives matter. If we learn from them and quickly move on. If we stop living in the past and embrace every moment and every new situation that we find ourselves in. If we adjust and grow from the situation. And if we keep smiling at the universe it will, undoubtedly, smile back at us.

I will always try my best to be grateful for the experiences I’ve had, good and bad ones, learn from them and move on.

People change. People do things that make no sense to you and you can’t always understand why. And perhaps you don’t need to? Perhaps sometimes it is better not to? It’s definitely best not to rack your own brain to try to understand their reasons and motivations. We are all different and we have different needs at different times in our lives. And the best one can do is accept that and try to look beyond the self and the effect other people’s words, or actions, have on us.

It is mostly not about you when people act differently from what you expected, or from your perspective irrationally or strangely. They have their reasons and unless they chose to share those reasons with you, the only thing you can do is accept and move on with your own life. There’s no point in trying to understand their reasons on your own. Instead you have to continue to focus on your own happiness, without them.

Because other people do not make your happiness. Only you can.

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